The Cheeky Talk Show! vol 1
by French Pop
Summary: Another talk-show fanfic. Lotsa drama and humor! Many, many love triangles in the MzChx series! Involves a variety of Nintendo characters, actually. Please R&R!
1. Default Chapter

The Cheeky Files (a small bio on some of the characters that will be in my stories)  
  
Mz/Chx 12-22-03  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters unless mentioned otherwise (but Mz/Chx is my persona so I do own myself!)  
  
Note: These bios will be the "prologe" (however you spell it) of every Mz/Chx story.  
  
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Mz/Chx: Short for Miss Cheex, she's one of the few blacks from the ghetto to host her own talk, game, and variety shows. Kinda rich and very successful, her shows have one thing in common: The Ludacris Call "Oooooh-oooooooooooh!".   
  
Mario: The happy, pudgy and naive Italian plumber. He only has eyes for Peach! Peach, he loved her sooooo much, yet she betrayed him. He will be missed. (refer to the Cheeky Talk Show vol.1)  
  
Luigi: A tru player and one of Yoshi's favorite customers (not *that* way). He's broken many hearts of many girls and turned them cold as stone. He's been arressted about 17 times and was a member of the Nintendo Mafia. Peach is his new victim!  
  
Peach: An ex-prostitute who is currently living off Luigi's riches. They're happily living together in the castle which was renovated to look very...green. Anyway, she feels awful about what happened to Mario but, oh well!  
  
Yoshi: The super-popular and famous multi-millionaire fashion designer of the famous and super-popular line "Just Yoshi". It's all green and his favorite customers include Link, Luigi, Saria and whoever else rocks green all the time. He's very happy but still looking for love.  
  
Daisy: The openly bisexual girl who has feelings for Peach and will do anything to eliminate Luigi (she was one of his victims) and rescue Peach. Oh, yeah, did we mention that she's head of the S.L.R.O.T. program (Stop Luigi's Reign Of Terror)? The company actually has many employees.  
  
Link: The once cute and nice boy has grown into a sexy and extremely obnoxious 17 year old. He's almost always angry at something and can be a real bitch if he doesn't get his way. He works at one of the country's most popular medieval-themed amusement parks. Also, he's engaged to Zelda who seems to be the only one who can take his personality.  
  
Saria: A Zelda-hater and president of the Kokiri Village in Hyrule, she's happy, bouncy and also trying to find a cure to the Kokiri's famed shortness because they're all pissed off about being called "little kids" all the time. Very smart and is currently stalking Link for betraying her. AND, she's an employee at the S.L.R.O.T.!  
  
Kafei: Also an adult of child height, he's very cute and Mz/Chx seems to favor HIM even over Link. He's gone to jail (or shall we say "juvie") before for the murder of his true love Anju who um "made fun of him in some ways..." He's currently doing shampoo ads for Paul Mitchell's, Herbal Shampoo, and Just For Me. He wears his Keaton Mask in public to hide his beauty form unworthy eyes.  
  
Zelda: Engaged to Link mainly so she'd have one of the best bodyguards. She thinks she's better than everyone else because she's a princess. She's good friends with Peach and a rival of Mz/Chx and Saria for obvious reasons. She's actually very intelligent for a blonde and says she'll be damned should anyone take Link from her.  
  
Donkey Kong: The primate from the Jungle was once a member of the Nintendo Mafia. He made a killing from the banana-flavored cocaine that tore the Jungle to shreds. He's changed his ways and is working hard to reconstruct rain forests worldwide and to hunt down his stolen recipe for the crack before it gets way out of hand. 


	2. Episode 1: Welcome 2 Cheeky Nintendo!

The Cheeky Show!  
  
by Mz/Chx (miss cheex)  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the following characters (except me and my friends, maybe) but it would be so raw if I did. Please R&R!  
  
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Episode #1: Welcome To Cheeky Nintendo!  
  
Mz/Chx: Hello everybody and welcome to the Cheeky Show! Starring yours truly, MzCheex! Ooh-ooh!  
  
Audience: Ooh-OOOOOHHH! (ludacris call)  
  
instant silence  
  
Mz/Chx: Now today's guests are people that you all know and love! Please welcome our first guest, Mario....Whatever his last name is...  
  
Audience: applauds and cheers as Mario walks onstage  
  
Mario: Hi-a every-a body. It's-a me, Mario! takes a seat  
  
Mz/Chx: So-a, how-a are-a you-a today-a?  
  
Mario: frowns I'd-a really-a appreciate it if you-a don't-a mimic-a my accent-a.  
  
Mz/Chx: Sorry, it's-a---I mean it's so fun! laughs and turns to audience Am I right?  
  
audience laughs  
  
Mario stares with a frown  
  
Mz/Chx: Okay, fine. Now, how are you today, Mario?  
  
Mario: I'm-a just-a fine-a! But I-a have-a no idea why I'm-a here though.  
  
Mz/Chx: Oh? looks at audience  
  
Audience: Oooooohhh??  
  
Mz/Chx: Well, our second guest is here to tell you why! takes a tape and puts in a VCR/TV combo machine thingy  
  
static  
  
Mz/Chx: This ghetto TV! bangs on TV and a tape of Peach is now visible on the screen  
  
Mario: shouts It's-a Peach-a!  
  
Peach On Tape: Mario, I know you are wondering why you are here on the Cheeky Show. When I come down those poorly built stairs, you shall find the answer.  
  
tape finishes  
  
Mz/Chx: Ooooookay. That was a quick lil'' tape. Now why don't you come downstairs Peachy!  
  
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2B Continued  
  
*What will Peach hafta say to Mario?  
  
*Are the stairs really built poorly?  
  
*Will Mz/Chx continue mimicing Mario's Italian accent in disregard to his request?   
  
Find out on the next Cheeky Show! Episode 2: Peach's Shrift ("shrift" means confession...)  
  
~Mzcheex 


	3. Episode 2: Peach's Shrift

The Cheeky Show!  
  
by Mz/Chx (miss cheex)  
  
Back for more huh? Did you Review? Well you'd betta! I know where you live!  
  
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Last Time On The Cheeky Show:  
  
I'm running a talk show. Mario is somehow invited on the show. He's all happy and bouncy and stuff, but he's pissed about the whole "accent-a" thing. Anyway, Peach is aboout to make her debut!  
  
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Episode #2: Peach's Shrift  
  
Mz/Chx: How's my makeup look, and dammit, where's my Italian sub?!  
  
Employee: I-I'm sorry, Miss Cheeks, I-I-I'll hop on it right away!  
  
Mz/Chx: It's Mzzz Cheex! Now go get my sub!  
  
Camera Man: Okay, and we're on the air!  
  
Mz/Chx: Wassup everybody! How y'all doin'! We have Mario here who has no idea why and now we're about to invite down our next guest! Princess "Peach" Toadstool, c'mon down!  
  
the sounds from the audience is a mix of cheers, boos, and unenthusiastic applause  
  
Peach: Thank you! Thank you! blows kisses Mwaa! Mwaa! Mwooooaaah!! fall in a hole in one of the stairs  
  
Mz/Chx: panics Uh, okay! Please standby!  
  
static  
  
Mz/Chx: Sorry bout that!  
  
Mario: Peach-a, you're-a makeup-a!   
  
Peach: Huh?  
  
Mario: It's-a...makes circular motions on his face with his hands  
  
Peach: . . . .?  
  
Mz/Chx: leans over You're lipstick is smudged and you have a little white crust on the corners of your mouth...  
  
Peach: Oh dear! Takes tissue from bosom and cleans her face off  
  
Mz/Chx: Ooooookaaaaaaaay... Now Peach, why have you requested that you be on my show today because honestly I have more important things to do. turns to audience and laughs  
  
Audience: laughs  
  
Peach: Well, I have a-a confession to make.  
  
Mario: snores  
  
Mz/Chx: Mario! Wake up! Peach has something very important to tell youuuuu!!  
  
Mario: wakes up O-a kay-a. I'm-a listening!  
  
Peach: Mario, this isn't at all easy to tell you...I do love you, though...And...Um...Even though we've been dating not to mention living together in the castle for 6 months but...  
  
Mz/Chx: Out with it dang-it!  
  
Peach: MarioI'vebeencheatingonyouforthepastfivemonths!  
  
Mz/Chx and Audience: *gasp!*  
  
Mario: !!! Did-a she just-a say what I-a think-a she-a said?  
  
Mz/Chx: Yes, Peach has been cheating on you!!!  
  
Mario: Peach! I-is this-a true? Please-a tell me this-a isn't-a true!!  
  
Peach: sobs I'm sorry Mario! I'm so sorry!  
  
Mario: But, but-a why-a?! I thought-a you were-a happy!!! I thought-a what we-a had-a was-a special?!?!  
  
Peach: It's just that, remember when we had that huge fight about me always picking Toad as my teammate in our sporting events?  
  
Mario: Yes-a but what-a has that-a got to-a do with anything-a?  
  
Peach: weeping I felt that...that you didn't love me anymore!!! So, one night as I was um...working, I ran into Luigi and he offered to take me in. I'm also sorry to say this but, his dick is bigger and he can lay the pipe better than you ever will!!!!  
  
Mario: .....!! I-I can't-a believe that-a you would-a tell-a me this on-a national-a television!!!  
  
Mz/Chx: THAT's why you cheated on him? THAT'S it?!?! Anyways, Luigi, c'mon down!!  
  
Luigi comes down the stairs (avoiding the hole Peach fell in) in a green fur coat and huge purple plat's.  
  
Mz/Chx: Damn Luigi, you look like a 70's pimp!  
  
Luigi: Well-a when you're-a pimp, you've-a gotta dress-a like one.  
  
Mario lunges towards Luigi and punches him  
  
Mz/Chx: What the hell?! Where's security?!?! looks to see security hiding behind stage shivering Hey, get your pussy asses out here, I don't pay you 10 bucks an hour to sit on your fat asses!!!  
  
security hesitates to stop the fight but manages to break up the Mario Bros.  
  
Mario: cries How-a could-a you-a do-a this-a to me!!   
  
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2B continued!  
  
Did'ya like it? Huh? Next episode, Luigi tells his story and more feathers fly!  
  
Episode #3: Luigi's Lies  
  
~Mz/Chx 


	4. Cheeky Commercial

And now, a short commercial!  
  
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a house on a nice street is bumping loud party music, inside the house, there are many teenagers dancing  
  
Boy: Dude! This is a bitchin' party!  
  
Other Dude: Yeah! But...sniffs What IS that bodacious stench?!  
  
Girl: Like, ew! I, like, smell it too!  
  
Other girl: sniffs It's coming from...her! points to a dorky-looking couple  
  
the music stops  
  
Dorky girl: Uh-oh! Now I'm the center of attention because of my unhealthy scent (from unmentionable places).  
  
Dorky boy: Yes, and my vest is awfully sweaty!  
  
Mz/Chx flies in with a small aerosol can  
  
Mz/Chx: Then you need, holds out can to the couple DE-BIODERANT!!  
  
Everybody else: DE-BIODERANT?  
  
Announcer guy: Yes, de-bioderant! The handy, discreet little can that you can take with you on the go so you can spray those nasty, foul odors of the human body!  
  
Girl: shrugs shoulders Really? What kinda bodily odors?  
  
Mz/Ch: Well, the spray inside this can is able to easily disguise smells such as urine, feces, vomit, fish-pussy, sweat, and more! tosses can to the dorky couple  
  
Dorky Couple: Thanx MzCheex!  
  
Mz/Chx flies off  
  
~end commercial  
  
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and now back to the show! -- 


End file.
